Sunday, December 21, 2014

Day 267 – Who I Was from the Beginning – Re-aligning my starting point, III

I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to see, realize, and understand that this existence and reality, exactly as it is now, is showing me the fully manifested consequences of what I have been, and am still, living now, as one who seeks the ultimate positive energy experience in-spite of everyone else and all of existence.

I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to see, realize, and understand that the experience of energy, of the mind, requires energy and that energy comes from the physical / substance.  Within this, I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to see, realize, and understand that to live as energy and as the mind requires a constant source of energy which requires an incessant and regardless resourcing and transforming of the physical into energy regardless of the consequences.  Within this, I forgive myself that I have failed to connect the dots, in that this reality, which has an economic system that requires the destruction of the physical to create money is showing me what I am in-fact doing within and as myself in exact detail and fully manifested consequences.  Within this, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to pursue only the self-interest of existing within and as an energy experience in blatant dis-regard for all life as can be seen and evidenced by this physical reality as it is now in all its manifested, extensive, and brutal abuses to the beings here right now on earth.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to abuse myself and diminish my beingness as a consequence to living as the mind for the experience of energy.  Within this, I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to see, realize, and understand that everything that I give of myself to the mind to live for me, is given away and thus my being-ness is diminished until I stand up and take back what I have given away of myself to energy and the mind, all for the ultimate experience of energy.

I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to consider changing my starting point to that what is best for all within the consideration that everything that I do, in-fact, affects all equally as one, which includes self which thus means that what is best for all is actually true self-interest.

I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to see, realize, and understand that energy is a product of the physical and only serves to create a feeling of living / a mirror image of life, but is not actually living.  Within this, I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to see, realize, and understand that when I remain here as a physical breathing being, requiring no experience of energy to be here, satisfied, happy, and entertained, that within this, I am already living here as my natural expression and taking a directive stand as the physical wherein I remain constant and stable as a physical being as; but that within my starting point of seeking only the ‘ultimate experience’ of energy, I am bowing down to energy and giving up my natural expression that is already whole and complete, for the experience of energy which is unstable and runs in cycles from positive to negative.  Thus, I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to see, realize, and understand that my starting point of self-interest, where I only seek the ultimate experience of self in-spite of all others and regardless of the consequences that I inflict on others through the relentless conversion of the physical that is required to support my energetic experience of self, is actually self-destructive; wherein, even though things may seem ‘good’ now, I will wind up extinguishing myself, through my own self-interest where I am relentlessly diminishing my physicality / my being-ness to the point that I will eventually be self-consumed for the sake of energy creation to the point where I no longer have any ability to stand within any directive principle of self as a physical being and thus will become the subject to energy as my master and less than life– where the very thing that gave me pleasure becomes my master and my own destruction.

No comments:

Post a Comment