Wednesday, October 7, 2015

Day 375 – Remaining calm / clear in surprise social / business situations. Part II

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame person X for my emotional reactions towards person x and the situation that person x created through interfering with my business.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to accumulate memories of person x staring at me while in business meetings and then critiquing me during and after business meetings from his own perspective – wherein I back chatted about how ridiculous he is and then within this have these memories trigger an emotional reaction in this current context.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to, instead of breathing through my emotional reactions towards person x in the past, that I instead accepted and allowed myself to backchat negatively about him after he interfered with my business in the past, of which this backchat accumulated layered as memories stored within and as my physical body and mind that acted like a backdrop / support / platform for more intense emotional reactions towards person X at this current time.  Within this, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in the “I’ve had enough!” character, wherein I justify within and as myself to myself and to others acting out emotionally towards and as a reaction to person X.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame person for my own emotional reactions.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see myself as the victim of person Xs bullshit.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to justify reacting emotionally to and towards and as a consequence of person Xs behavior because “he has behaved like this in the past” and because I am participating in the idea that “I have had enough!”  Within this, I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to see, realize, and understand that from the starting point of equality and oneness and living within and as the physical and the breath, as who I am, that I have 2 choices to make as to how to handle person x:  1: I breathe and move on in the most practical and effective manner to manage my affairs as well as I breathe through and self forgive to release myself from and delete all backchats and emotional reactions that come up towards person x OR 2: I do number 1 as well as directly speak to person X about this manner in a calm, practical, and mutually beneficial way.  Within this, I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to see, realize, and understand that all other emotional reactions, fears, angers, frustrations, characters such as “I’ve had enough” are just mental energetic bullshit systems that are abusing my physical and all life on earth as a consequence as well as giving permission for people like person X to exist in the first place.  Within this, I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to see, realize, and understand that I have giving permission for person X to exist as well as indirectly created this entire situation as well as this entire world system of economic slavery of which creates the conditions of everybody being stressed out about money and thus behaving from a starting point of fear – through my existing and living as and for positive energy experiences instead of realizing who I am as the physical and living as the physical.

 

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