Day 410 - More on Suppression

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge others as good or bad and then keep that to myself not realizing that by doing so I am suppressing.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create and then hold opinions and judgments of others in separation of myself as them in my secret mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fantasize about things that I desire and then keep this secret so that others do not see the truth of me and so that I can paint a pretty picture of myself on the outside.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to harbor sexual fantasies within and as my mind as me where I keep these secret and thus suppressed but fear facing them as if I might be missing out or losing something if I give up my secret fantasies and secret desires.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react towards others negatively and then suppress this by keeping it secret instead of facing these reactions one by one as they come up, in breath, so as to eventually stop.

I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to see, realize, and understand that when I react negatively towards another, that this being is a mirror reflecting me back to me and that the source of the reaction is within and as me, and what I have accepted and allowed within and as myself, and not the other being.  Thus, within this, I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to see, realize, and understand that these are gifts showing me points to look within and as myself, such as fears, etc that I may hold that are the actual source of the reaction.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed to suppress judgments of others until they accumulate into a out-ward reaction triggered by something that they do.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to accumulate suppressed energy as thoughts, judgments, reactions, opinions, into and as my physical body over time without paying attention nor realizing that I am doing so every time I accept and allow this to go on in my mind without facing it through self forgiveness and in breath.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear / react in fear to the point of crystallized suppressions.

I commit myself to slow down and breathe so that I can see my mind instead of being lost in it as it, and thus support myself to stop suppressing by doing forgiveness in the moment when these come up and then also writing them out one by one methodically over time so as to stop suppressing altogether.