I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react
to the time that it takes to move from the initiation of an event,
for instance the moment I realize I might lose a large amount of
money in some way, to the resolution of that event with the energy /
emotion of waiting – wherein this emotion / energy is created as a
consequence to my participation in thoughts like: 'I cannot wait that
long to find out what will happen to me.'; 'I must find out now.'; 'I
will not be able to focus on anything else until I find out what will
happen to me with this.'; 'what will my life be like if the
worst-case scenario were to happen to me.' - of which I forgive
myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in such
thoughts within and as my mind instead of remaining here and stopping
those thoughts the moment that they come-up.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create
and perpetuate within and as myself the belief that 'there are
certain things that I cannot stand through, such as: loosing too much
money wherein I am not able to pay for my bills and financial
responsibilities; loosing one of my children; loosing my partner.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to
participate in the fear of loss.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define
myself within what it is that I have now and can control within my
reality – wherein if I were to potentially loose it or loose
control of it I react in worry to try to maintain control and get it
back or prevent it from happening.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to see, realize,
and understand that the only control that I really have is over
myself and who I am in every breath. Within this, I forgive myself I
have not allowed myself to see, realize, and understand that this
control / self-control is expressed within and as my ability to
investigate my reality and project within and as my mind the
potential outcomes that I face based upon the decisions that I make;
and from there I have the ability to decide and direct myself to move
myself in a specific direction to minimize the risk of consequences
that I would like to avoid, but beyond that I have no actual control
over the outcome of events in the physical and no amount of thinking
and worrying and fearing will aide me in changing or guaranteeing a
potential reality to manifest.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to
believe that worrying, fearing, and obsessing over a specific point
will do anything whatsoever to change or alter or control the
potential out come of that which I worry about.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react
in fear to the idea of NOT worrying over the potential outcome of an
event.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react
in fear to the space / empty space that exists between the initiation
of an event and the resolution of an event; and then within and as
this fear I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to
participate in the idea that 'if only I can find a way out / a
solution then I can stop this fear. Within this, I forgive myself
that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that the way to
stop my fear reaction is to react with the energy of worry where I
actually cater to this fear through analyzing a situation over and
over again from every conceivable angle and then try to find a
solution over and over again through the use of future projections /
imaginations within and as my mind / the pictures in my mind.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to see, realize,
and understand that the way to stop fear is to simply remain here,
within and as the physical, and breathe / through breathing I stop
fear.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react
to the energy of waiting and fear that I have accepted and allowed to
fill the empty space that exists between the initiation and
resolution of an event with the energy of worry.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to
believe that worry is justified.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to punish
myself with the energy of worry.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to
believe that there are certain circumstances that require the energy
reaction of worry and that there are times that I 'deserve' to be
punished with the energy of worry.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to
believe that if I do not worry then I am not doing anything about
that which I face.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to see, realize,
and understand that there is an element of lack of self-trust that
exists along side the energy of worry – where I do not trust myself
to be able to stand through the consequences whatever they may be and
I do not trust myself to have made the right decisions in the first
place to have not manifested adverse consequences.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to see, realize,
and understand that a lack of self-trust shows me that I have
neglected to remain here as the director of me within each and every
breath because if I were to do so, then every decision I make would
be best for all and best for me thus I would never have anything to
worry about because I would always be here for myself.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to
believe that there is ever something that I cannot stand through and
remain here as if certain things inherently are too much to bear -as
if I can only stand up to a certain point and from there I must let
the mind take over.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to
surrender my self-directiveness to the mind when and as I perceive
that there is something that I face that is too much to bear.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to
participate in the thought that 'I just cannot stand through this. I
must worry.'
Part 3 will be a very specific self-corrective piece where I
script out exactly how I will stand and stop this worry energy
reaction.
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