Day 302 – The ‘I must veg-out’ character

Everyday, I inevitably get to that point of ‘I must 'veg. out’ even if it is just for a little while at the end of the day usually.  But why is this?  Why do I go into this character?  Does it really support me? 

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into the ‘I must veg-out’ character, especially at the end of the day where I accept and allow back-chat like ‘I must have some time to 'veg-out’ and ‘I am not living if I don’t veg out.’ And ‘I am missing out if I don’t get to have my veg-out time.’ And ‘I will not be satisfied with my living experience if I don’t get my veg out time.’

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create within and as myself a belief system that ‘vegging out at the end of the day is a requirement to live a happy and full life’.  Within this, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to turn this belief system into a form of a religion wherein I feel that it is my duty to worship the vegging out god of doing nothing but mere entertainment in order to appease this god so that I am not found guilty of always ‘working’.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge doing practical things such as ‘going that extra mile within regards to my work commitments, my DIP assignments, housework, yard work, focusing on kids or the needs of others – as boring and unfulfilling as if the only thing that is truly fun and fulfilling is ‘vegging out and doing absolutely nothing or only what I have formed desire relationships towards.’

Thus, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into mind possessions wherein I become consumed and possessed to just veg-out and do nothing at all instead of focusing on moving myself to what is best for all at all times.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge doing what is best for all at all times as boring / unfulfilling / negative.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to develop a character around vegging out, where I will defend my right to veg out with all kinds of justifications and excuses such as ‘everyone has to ‘veg out sometimes’, and ‘if I don’t veg out, then I will be missing out on fully experiencing life.’

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a belief within and as myself that vegging out is a solution to stress when I see, realize, and understand that stress is something that I create within and as myself within my own mind and the thoughts, reaction, and internal conversations that I accept and allow.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that vegging out is a solution to boredom when I see, realize, and understand that boredom does not even really exist and thus is merely a mind possession that I created.

When and as I see myself going into the verging out character, where I start participating in backchats as excuses and justifications as to why I should ‘veg-out instead of apply myself to do what is best for all / most productive with my time, I stop and I breathe.  I realize that vegging out is no solution and that the best solution is to breathe, clear myself of all energies positive and negative and neutral, and then apply myself to do what is best for all at all times so that I can be the most effective human possible – as this is my duty as the physical and as life – to be most effective so that I can work to bring solutions to the world and myself that will be life as enjoyable as possible for all as one as equal as self.