Day 129 – The Need to be Right

I've been writing a lot on the ego and personalities, kind of in a way to just explore this topic. Its kind of evolving into what I see as the need to be 'right'. So, I am going to finish this thread with self-forginvess and corrective application on the need to be right.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to be 'right'

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have the desire to have others see me as 'right'

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in the thought 'oh shit what I if I am not right'

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to defend myself so that I will not have to face maybe not being 'right'

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself, through the eyes of others, as stupid or less-than and incapable of survival in this system, should I be proven 'wrong'.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed msyelf to have the need to have the 'last word' in order to ensure that others pervieve me as 'right'

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to look for a 'fight' within the point of proving myself 'right' with others.

I forgive msyelf that I have accepted and allowed myself to become addicted to the energy of debate.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed msyelf to beleve that debating on a topic actually has any solution as a result.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that proving my 'point' will have any real benefit.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to justify my going into the energy of debate and proving my point within doing for the so-called 'victums' out there being 'victimized' by my 'oponents' viewpoint's ramification, such as victims of war, or vaccines, ect.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react to words.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react to words read or heard by others speaking or writing something that is in conflict with my knowledge and information, by going into all kinds of backchats and internal dialogs in my mind like 'oh no, that's not right, I can't let them get away with that, what about the children, don't they care about the children?, oh, god, don't they think for themselves?' ect – and within this I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to see, realize, and understand that by reacting withi this backchat that I am going into the energy of my mind which builds into more reactions and outbursts, thus my entrie interaction with these people from this point forward is of energy and sepratation.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from others as me, by reacting to their words – instead of just being here and breathing and hearing them speak, as me, as one with me – with a silent mind, not thinking at all just being here.

I forgive msyelf that I have accepted and allowed myself to ignore the realization that the confusion that exists in this world is representative of the confustion that exits within one's own mind, within the point that no one really understands one's own mind – and therefore this world is a world of secrets and lies – thus, we will all be in disagreement with each other until we look within ourselves and sort our own shit out.

When and as I see myself going into reactions and backchats to the words that other people speak or write, I stop and I breathe. I do not accept and allow myself to react to the words that other's speak, like in participating in internal converstations and backchats or emotions of anger or frustrations – because I see, realize, and understand that by doing so I am creating an energy that I am going into and then trapping myself within, in my own mind – loosing myself to the mind, in separation from the very people whos words I am hearing. And within this, I am no longer 'here', I am no longer really able to 'hear' the words of others because they are being mixed with all the reactions, interpretations, and bullshit in my own mind-consciousness system. Thus, I am only reacting and participating in the energy of the reactions of which I am accepting and allowing myself to be addicted to. And witihn my reactions, I am separated from others as me and all that is here, as me – which has the consequence to cause the very 'disagreement' that I am now in, as a consequence of participating in the energy of the mind is to have disagreements about what is real and what is really here, because no one really is able to see things for what they are through the mind.

So, I stop, I breahte. And thus, I commit myself to remaining here and breathing through all the words that people speak and write, and only responding if I am 'here' and clear with no reactions.